Cool your jets and calm yourself, 'cause we are almost there,
Don't get lost; those animals will give you quite a scare,
Hold your horse or face the terror that's in store for you,
You're so dumb, you're doomed no matter what you do.

Christian got mauled at the zoo,
Christian got mauled at the zoo,
Christian got mauled at the zoo,
Mauled at the zoo.

Now you're it, there is no use in trying to run away,
No escape and now, my friend, it's time to play,
Take a look around; you're trapped with no where left to run,
It appears this story is almost done.

Christian got mauled at the zoo,
Christian got mauled at the zoo,
Christian got mauled at the zoo,
Mauled at the zoo.

Chris, do you feel lucky'
Do you think that your invincible'
Your smile says come get me, and now you'd better run,
Your goose is on the table,
Your fate is irreversible,
Can you read your label' - It says, "Eat meat, have fun."

Christian got mauled at the zoo,
Christian got mauled at the zoo,
Christian got mauled at the zoo,
Mauled at the zoo,
Christian got mauled at the zoo,
Christian got mauled at the zoo,
Christian got mauled at the zoo,
Mauled at the zoo,
Christian got mauled at the zoo,
Christian got mauled at the zoo,
Christian got mauled at the zoo,
Mauled at the zoo,
Christian got mauled at the zoo,
Christian got mauled at the zoo,
Christian got mauled at the zoo,
Mauled at...

(oh, wait; I don't say zoo)