See that kid, give him some toys,
See those girls, gotta given 'em some boys,
See those feet, give 'em some shoes,
See that drunk, gotta give him some booze.

Says Constance of the Universe,
She's unique in all the earth,
We will hope for all we're worth to be the center of her great expanding girth.

See that bum, give him some cash,
See that dope, gotta give him a stash,
See that soul, give him the word,
See that jerk, gotta give him the bird.

Says Constance of the Universe,
She's unique in all the earth,
We will hope for all we're worth to be the center of her great expanding girth.

See the rock band, give 'em a deal,
See those legs, go on give 'em a feel,
Now, see that gun, give it a try,
See that truth, gotta give it a lie.

Says Constance of the Universe,
She's unique in all the earth,
We will hope for all we're worth to be the center of her great expanding...
Constance of the Universe,
She's unique in all the earth,
We will hope for all we're worth to be the center of her great expanding girth.

It's her time now,
Constance needs to breed,
See her shine now,
Tell her what you need,
It's her time now,
Constance needs to breed,
See her shine now.